More Ethiopia

 Our girls Wed morning

 This is the Family Morning Coffee Guesthouse where we stayed.  If you get the chance to be in Ethiopia I can not give a higher recommendation for lodging.  Meeting the amazing owners, Birtukan and Nesibu, and being inspired by the work they do for widows and orphans through their NGO Yezalelem Minch,  is a remarkable experience.  http://familymorningcoffeeguesthouse.com/

 Out for a walk, we saw a donkey

 some goats

 and some cows wandering down the street.

 We walked down to a field hoping to find a place to play soccer. Here are some homes near the field.

 I had read that dressing similar to your child can help them identify with being part of your family, thus the matching outfits. I had also read that having a "family motto" could help in building family identity so we'd put our hands on top of each others and say "1,2,3, silly Sunds" I'm amazed by how much all our kids love this!

 An Ethiopian Feast at the guesthouse, Yum!! There wasn't a meal at the guesthouse Ella didn't eat, one night when she was really tiered I tried feeding her some plain white rice and she didn't want it. Then I offered her some spiced Ethiopian rice and she ate two servings. All the food at the guesthouse was amazing.

 Two sweet girls who were pretending to be asleep but couldn't stop laughing.

Thursday was a holiday so we spent all day at the guesthouse.

 Mekdes, Ella and Birtukan's daughter Sami painted their toe nails

 Thursday night two of the families who had been staying with us left with their newly adopted children for the states.  I think that seeing them leave was emotionally confusing for Mekdes, why are they leaving and she's not, and the reality of the "big change" as we call the adoption, "Telique lout" in Amharic.  Ella and Mekdes watched a movie on the laptop Thursday before bed, when it was time to shut off the movie Mekdes began to pout and would not lie down, we told her it was time for bed, she understood what we wanted but she got up, got her leapster and turned it on, we took it away and told her it was time for bed.  She wouldn't lay down. I had to pick her up, lay her down, and then lay down to go to sleep beside her. She sat up and started pealing the nail polish off her toes. I layed her down again and rested my arms around her and could feel her silently crying, "big change"  My heart was broken for her and the overwhelming experience she was living.  She finally took a drink of her water and burped. I giggled and mimicked her burp, she giggled and through the universal language of burps and laughter harmony was restored and she was soon asleep.


Friday was a difficult day (and when I write about the behavior we've experienced through this transition of Mekdes into our family please understand that this is expected with older child adoption, her world has been turned upside down and she has no control. )
She woke up and immediately took the chocolate out of my suitcase, "no, we're going up to breakfast" Greg explained in Amharic.  Lip curl, narrow eyes, shoulders up turned, her back to us, stiff, would not move.  I picked up her stiff body and just talked normally/cheerfully to her and carried her up to breakfast, she relaxed once at the table and ate.

 We went to the opulent Sheraton Hotel for a morning in the pools.  This was her first time at a pool so we weren't sure how she'd react, she loved it! No fear! She ran right into water.  She'd run from one pool to another and we'd follow.  She kept trying to drink the water.  Greg told her the water was bad not to drink it and she said in amharic "No daddy the water is beautiful!!!" Going back through the hotel the girls enjoyed the flowers and the fountains. Although trying to keep Mekdes from picking the flowers was a challenge.  Mekdes did not want to hold my hand and would struggle against it, she'd hold Ella's hand and pull her as she raced along.

After the hotel we went out to eat and when I wouldn't let M have my coffee she again pouted, standing with her back towards the table for a good 20 min. A quick shrug of the shoulders to us when we'd try to talk to her. I finally picked up her stiff body and carried her around the garden talking normally to her showing her all the pretty flowers, soon she was relaxed then hyper,  racing around and climbing on decorations that were not for climbing.  I ended up picking her up going to the table and telling Greg I needed to take her out to the van and wait there, thankfully everyone was ready to leave by that time and we headed back to the guesthouse.  We spent the afternoon at the guesthouse and she wanted nothing to do with us. If we sat near her she would move, if not out of the room then to a spot where her back would be towards us.  Thankfully she still wanted to play with Ella so we knew that if she was doing anything dangerous or destructive Ella would come and tell us.  Once when she got up to leave the room I entered, I called her. Without looking back she gave me the quick shoulder shrug and kept walking.  I went and picked her up and sat her next to me and tried to explain that we understand it's a big change and that we love her, she shrugged, got up and walked away.

  At dinner we told Birtukan what had been going on and asked if she'd be willing to talk with Mekdes, they had a good talk and it seemed to help a great deal.  Saturday Mekdes was joyfully excited about going to America, we spent the entire wonderful day with Birtukan and her family, visiting the YM soccer team, the feeding program for YM sponsor children and then attending a birthday party for two of  Birtukan and Nesibu's sons.

 Our flight home began Sat night and Mekdes and Ella both did wonderfully and slept the entire first flight to Amsterdam. When we got home Ella fell asleep on the couch and Mekdes very cutely explored every nook and cranny of our house.
 We had ordered some Ethiopian food to be delivered from an Ethiopian women in town who makes food for the farmers market.  What a ton of wonderful food!  Mekdes ate it for breakfast and lunch over the next two weeks and we recently pulled more out of the freezer for another meal with our Amharic tutor.

I will eventually sit down and write about life in our house over the last 5 weeks. Things are good, but it has not been easy.